There Goes the Neighborhood
Ugh… well we got our new neighbors this week. I knew this would happen here eventually. We’d been lucky so far that the folks that have lived behind us were 1) a quiet single guy, 2) elderly woman, and 3) single college student.
Now make that 4) Two hoodlum roommates.
The way our place is situated our house is what you see from the street. But behind our house, literally in the back yard is another small house with a little two car garage. There’s one driveway that runs from the street out front of our house, to the alley in the back. It’s not ideal, but it works for now. I guess I had kinda gotten used to a single person always living there (I’m pretty sure it’s a one bedroom house), so there was always one car there. Made maneuvering around pretty doable. Now there’s two cars back there, which sure they are entitled… but it makes getting in and out of our half of the garage a pain in the ass now.
The worst part is that ever since they moved in, people have been coming and going all the freakin’ time. There were two high school aged kids that were sitting in the driveway, waiting for the new neighbors to get home for (no exaggeration) 4 hours. There’s not too many things kids that age will wait that long for, and I’m pretty sure none of them are legal.
Maybe I’m a grumpy old fart now. But I just don’t feel like putting up with it. This really isn’t a great time for a move, but since we aren’t locked in to a lease here, I’m really going to start looking around. Ugh. I can’t wait until we’re ready to buy a house.
Hilarious phone call last night.
So nothing much of interest usually happens when I’m at the radio station late running the board for a ball game. But last night I got a call on the business line that I just about couldn’t keep a straight face though. I wish I could have recorded it. I’ll try to recite the call as well as I can remember it.
The woman was older, but not senior aged. Maybe late 40′s with a slight rasp to her voice. Her words were spoken with a general tone of bewilderment.
“Eagle Radio and Hull Broadcasting,” I answered.
“Yeah, uh. Is Trader John on today?” she said, I assume she is talking about ‘Trading Post’ hosed by our AM guy, John.
“Umm… Yes ma’am. It was on at 9:00 today and will be on again at 9:00 tomorrow,” I answered.
“Oh, so he’s going to start doing it at night now?” she said a bit suprised.
“No, no. 9:00 to 10:00 in the morning,” I said.
“But I have my radio on right now and I’m picking up some other guy,” she said as if I were lying to her face.
“Well, it’s 9:30 a night right now…” I replied in a deadpan tone.
“IT’S NINE O’CLOCK AT NIGHT?” she bellered.
“Yes, ma’am,” I said trying to keep from snickering, but somewhat wondering if she is messing with me.
“Oh, don’t tell me I slept all day. Are you sure? Oh no. Okay… well… thank you…” she said.
“No problem, Trading Post should be on in about 12 hours!” I couldn’t help it, I let out a small chuckle before hanging up the phone.
I just want bigger boots.
Well I’ve had a resolution for this winter to be better equipped to handle the weather. So a few days ago I picked up some snow boots and insulators to keep my feet nice warm and dry. Well I tried the boots on at the store, but I couldn’t try on the insulators unless I took them out of the package. Get home and boots + insulators = too small. No biggie. I’ll just take them back and exchange them. I figure a couple sizes bigger on both outta do it.
So last night we roll up to Orschlen’s. There were several cars there, but I wouldn’t say they were swamped. I grab the boots, insulators, and my original reciept and head to the nearest checkout stand. I’m not sure how exchanges work at Orschlen’s, but I explain to the guy that I just want to exchange these for the same thing bigger size. He says that’s fine and asks me to place my stuff in a cart right up front there and go get what I need.
We do so, and look around a little bit to see if there’s anything else we need while we’re there. After a while of just window shopping we head to the front with just the items I want to exchange. I go to the same guy I went to before (you know since I already talked to him about exchanging) even though his line was a little bit longer. As it would turn out, this guy is the Smokey Dan of Orschlen Farm & Home. So from now on, we’ll just call him Dan.
Dan appeared to be “training” someone. I use the quotes because the trainee seemed to be helping this guy make it through some snags in the computer system. It wasn’t the computer system’s fault. It’s just that you can’t do things like, type in a zip code, when there’s an error message on the screen saying you forgot the city “Please click OK.” Eventually he gets my old reciept scanned in, rings up my new items and says, “That’ll be $25.”
“Huh? I’m just exchanging this stuff for the exact same things. Same prices and everything!”
“Well you didn’t tell me that before,” Dan said.
“Sorry. I had both these items in my hands when I talked to you the first time AND placed them both in the cart you told me to put them in which looks like somebody else already hauled off.”
Dan sighed and said, “Okay.”
The next 8 minutes or so involved Dan trying to undo everything he just did. After many dings, and error messages he finally decides it will be FASTER to start over. Genius. So he trys to, I guess, cancel out the sale and manages to freeze the check out machine up. I don’t know how you crash a POS machine, but he did it. Meanwhile somebody is asking him for his override code for another register. OH, apparently this guy is IN CHARGE tonight! I can’t even ask if the manager is here! After giving the gal the WRONG code and her having to come back twice while he fiddles with the machine trying to figure out how to restart it he decides it would be FASTER to move to another register.
So for the third time I explain how to spell my last name, and give him my address and phone number so he can put it in again incorrectly a third different way. BUT FINALLY I have a receipt that says I can leave the store with boots and insulators and not owe them anything! HOORAY!
It was frustrating, but now I’ve got me some boots that will keep my feet and pants warm and dry. Good thing to as it looks like we’ve already got a good amount of snow overnight and more to come today. Bring it ON!
What makes a terrible commercial?
Answer: Terrible copy.
The following has got to be one of the worst commercials I’ve cut in a while. I’ll first give you the whole thing. Read it. Digest it. Then I’ll tear it apart line by line. The names of the person and the business have been changed so I don’t pop up in search engine traffic and then word gets back to the boss. Not good for Matt’s employment.
John Spanner and Great Valley Packing… Two names that are synonymous with success. Great Valley Packing IS John Spanner. That’s means they are part of the oldest continuous meat manufacture in the United States. John Spanner in Great Valley specializes in the production of specialized meats like smoked hams and bacon. They use the latest in technology along with the principle of quality by all their workers to produce the taste in meats their customers want. John Spanner of Great Valley…Shipping smoked hams and bacons across the United States…and the world.
Okay. I’m no copy writer, but I do have a knack for sensing when somebody is a bit full of themselves! This commercial starts out terrible from the beginning. When I proof read it, I thought surely it would get better as the spot went on, they they just had a terrible lead in. But actually it was very in tone with the rest of the spot.
John Spanner and Great Valley Packing… Two names that are synonymous with success.
Now there’s an unsubstantiated claim if I ever heard one. “Nintendo” is synonomous “video games”. People say, “Hey, let’s go play Nintendo.”
They DON’T say, “Wow, Bob. Your business is really taking off, you’re a regular John Spanner!” When people think “success” NOBODY thinks “John Spanner” OR “Great Valley Packing”. And this commercial has yet to convince me otherwise. Let’s continue, perhaps they’ll back up this claim.
Great Valley Packing IS John Spanner.
I suppose that’s true, if both are synonomous with success, I suppose they would be synonomous with each other too. And it IS true. Success IS success. No if’s an’s or but’s about it.
That’s means they are part of the oldest continuous meat manufacture in the United States.
What? Wait, THAT’S what that means? I’m feeling really out of the loop about now. How long have people in the United States been packing meat? Was John Spanner really there when it all started? How old is this dude? IF John Spanner REALLY IS Great Valley Packing AND that DOES MEAN that they’re part of the oldest continuous meat manufacture in the United States; THEN by my estimation This guy has to be AT LEAST 100 years old. Is that somebody you really want handling powerful spinning blades? And who’s this “they”? I thought it was just Mr. Spanner.
John Spanner in Great Valley specializes in the production of specialized meats like smoked hams and bacon.
Well if you’re going to specialize in something, it might as well be something specialized, I guess. But are smoked hams and bacon really all that special? I’m pretty sure I can get those from the Schwan’s guy, or Wal-Mart. What’s so special about them?
They use the latest in technology, along with the principle of quality, by all their workers to produce the taste in meats their customers want.
First of all, I don’t even think this is a sentence by grammatical standards. And I don’t know about you but when I walk into the Specialized Meat section to check out the bacon, I try to look for the bacon that was sliced by LASERS! After all, meat just tastes better when you use the latest technology.
John Spanner of Great Valley…Shipping smoked hams and bacons across the United States…and the world.
This line would be a perfect end to the commercial…had John been able to back up any of his grandiose claims. But instead it leaves me thinking, “Seriously, John. Name one place outside the USA you’ve shipped some bacons. I’ll even let you count Hawaii and Alaska.”
This isn’t a commercial about selling a product. John just paid a princely sum in order to hear his name on the radio and feel good about himself. While it may satisfy is narcissistic tendencies, I feel that money would be better spent on therapy.
Things you hear people say.
As I’m going about my business, I like to take in what’s going on around me. I used to walk on the campus at K-State and hear people talking on their cell phones and to each other. Just random stuff. Some people call that eavesdropping, I just call it entertaining.
Today I heard a group of people talking and one of them said, “Go to the FBI website. They have a list of all the sexual predators and your daddy is on there.”
Did I hear this at?
a) Work
b) Grocery Store
c) Wal-Mart
If you said (c) you are CORRECT!
I tell you the more I observe all the weirdness in the world, the more I think “normal” is pretty rare.
Get your facts straight.
My phone starts ringing at about 7:24am this morning. It’s my day off and I was wondering who in the hell was calling me this early. I pick up the phone and it’s my manager at the store. He says “Did you know you work 7-4 today?” I was all groggy from just waking up after going to bed at 3am. I said “No. I thought I had today off since I asked for it off.” He said “It says on my computer that that’s what you work today. If you could come in as soon as possible everything will be ok.”
I’m thinking I already have my 40 hours for the week, why would they have me scheduled for another 8 hours? I told him “I asked for the day off cause I have family coming to visit, so I really can’t come in. Plus, that would put me over my 40 hours.” He proceeds to tell me “That’s all right. You could work till 1 and the rest of the day should be fine.” I said “The schedule on the wall doesn’t say that I’m scheduled today.” He goes “Really? Let me go check. …. Yeah, it doesn’t have you on that one, go ahead and forget about it and go back to sleep.”
I didn’t even bother to say goodbye, I just hung up and went back to sleep. That just goes to show you that computers can really help you, but they can also put you on the schedule when you’re supposed to have the day off. Tricky little things!
For all you people who wish you won radio contests…
Consider this. We just finished up our Extreme Makeover contest. If you’ve ever seen the show, Ty Pennington busts in on somebody’s place, takes over there house and remodels it. Kinda like a Pimp My Ride for homes. Well we just kinda steal the name and use it instead of calling the contest “A bunch of crap you don’t really need.” We delivered today “Almost $7,000 worth of stuff.” Which was actually around $6,250 worth of stuff, so we really should have said “Almost almost $7,000 worth of stuff.”
And that’s all it is, is stuff. No real rhyme or reason to the collection of items. We gave a surround sound system but no TV or no couch. Not one, but TWO dining room tables! (For BOTH your dining rooms!) And antique wood framed mirror. A closet organizer, and supposedly $800 in bed and bath accessories. Which should take up more than two bags if you ask me. Check out one of these dining room tables, yeah…where you gonna put that in your house?
Point is, even though it sounds good on the air, don’t be too heartbroke if you don’t win some of that stuff. There’s a young couple in a small house in Manhattan that isn’t going to be able to use their living room until they have a garage sale or an auction, or rent a storage unit. When $6,000 cash would have fit in their back pocket and they could have gotten something they actually wanted.
Some people just don’t think.
Most of the decisions you’ll face in life are trivial at best. Let’s face it, out of all the choices you made today, how many will affect you a year from now, or even tomorrow? At the same time, there’s some decisions that will affect you for the rest of your life.
One example of an important choice would be…say…choosing a name for your company. For instance, if you needed a contractor, would you trust a company called “Jon Doe Enterprises”? I kid you not, I cut a commercial today for “Jon Doe’s” contracting company. The copy didn’t have the address (naturally) but I’m sure it’s somewhere in Anytown, USA.
Words couldn’t begin to describe…
…how terrible our tech guy is at work. Perhaps he’s just phenominally unlucky, like losing a coin toss 100 consecutive times unlucky.
Computers are bitches. Especially “shared” computers where lots of people use the same computer. I know from first hand experience. Somebody visits a questionable website just once and BAM virus or spyware! They should know better, but they don’t care because it isn’t their machine. And when you have around 20 computers being used daily by a bunch of different people, eventually hard drives are going to fail, power supplies will go out. Those things just happen.
I’ll try to remember everything that’s gone wrong with our machines in the past year or two. This will be a conservative account, seeing as how I’m sure to forget an instance or two. You tell me if it’s just bad luck.
- 6 new motherboards
- At least 5 failed hard drives
- 1 defective LCD monitor
- 7 new power supplies
- Replaced entire system except hard drive because it wouldn’t connect to the network
- Replaced hard drive for above system
- 1 Non-Genuine copy of Windows XP
- Whatever I forgot
Unfortunately it’s not just an excessivly high failure rate in the products this guy sells that leads me to believe that he’s a total d-bag. It’s the ridiculious crap that he and his employees say to people around here that don’t know any better. For instance.
“I’m installing Double Density Ram, so after this it will be twice as fast.”
“You can’t use that router because it will take up too many IP addresses.”
“That Windows installation is so old, it’s probably started deleting system files.”
If the above statements don’t mean anything to you, good. It just makes it all the more clear what kind of person or persons we’re dealing with here. Every statement is completely false, and every one I’ve overheard these guys saying to someone around here that has no idea about computers. To me that’s just taking advantage of somebody, unless they truely are that naieve.
So there’s one of two possibilities here. ONE: That I am actually better versed in technology than this guy and his employees. Or TWO: That this guy runs a shady business selling cheap and/or second hand crap as new and bluffs his way around it when things get sticky.
Either way, given his track record, I don’t know how we’re still doing business with him. But since the people calling the shots don’t know any better, I’ll have to continue to tolorate it. Just don’t touch my laptop!
Stupid O’Reillys fools.
Well I’m getting ready to head out for Thanksgiving in the Toronado, and it’s been a hair over 3,000 miles since my last oil change. So I figure best change it before I put another 700 miles on. I go in and pick up some vacuum line to fix the cruse control so it works all the time, not just when it wants to. I forgot the filter number so they looked that up for me. I got a high milage filter for cars with over 75,000 miles. I think my car qualifies. 
I grab some STP oil treatment and 4 quarts of oil.
The guy asks me if that’s it, and I tell him to ring me up. He rings it up and asks if I have another quart of oil at home or something. I tell him no, that my car only takes 4 quarts. Heck I thought it was weird at first too. But one guy behind the counter gives me a funny look like I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about, and the guy ringing me up says, “Well let’s look it up.” So he looks it up, and he says, “Oh. 3.8 quarts plus filter volume.” a.k.a. 4 QUARTS! I may not be able to overhaul an engine, but I at least know how much friggin oil my car needs.
By the way, oil isn’t that cheap at O’Reillys. Unless you want to mess with their mail in rebate. No thanks, it’s not worth 10 minutes of work and 2 months of waiting to get my $4.00 back. I’ll just get it at Wal-Mart next time.
It doesn’t matter whether it’s the auto parts store, Best Buy, or just about anywhere. Why is it a guy can’t just walk into a store, buy what he wants to buy and get out without being treated like an idiot that doesn’t know what the hell they’re doing. I want four quarts of oil. Maybe I just want to slather it all over myself and go sliding naked across a basketball court. Just give me four quarts!!!
Nasa lost…err…unfound moon tapes.
Apparently there are 13,000 reels of video tape from all the Apollo moon landings from liftoff to splash down. With Nasa hoping to go back to the moon sometime in the next 15 years, they wouldn’t mind taking a look at them, right? Well, somehow they’ve misplaced the 2,000 boxes that the tapes are in.
But according to Nasa, they’re not lost.
“The tapes aren’t lost, insists the NASA official put in charge of the search. But he doesn’t know where they are.“
Forbes.com
I always thought I knew what lost meant, but now I don’t know. I mean those Nasa guys are obviously smarter than I am.
It’s quiet around here!
Fuzz and I are spending a lot of quality time together. Duane took off for school a few days ago. His first couple of weeks is just prep time for taking the CDL learner’s permit test. If they don’t pass that they can’t take the class. Today was their first quiz. All this makes me glad I have the job I have. I don’t think I could restart schooling this late in life.
Speaking of my job…I served my first (known) DUI last week. When the lady came in and told me she’d gotten a DUI after drinking all the beer I had served her the day before I felt really bad. But, I gotta admit the guilt didn’t last long. Seriously, is it my fault? I don’t think so. Heck, I wasn’t even around when she’d gotten her three previous DUIs. After three, the fourth DUI is her own flippin’ fault.
WHY!?
click the image to see the full screen….but anyway this is from work we got in a laptop that wouldnt boot sure enough it didn’t. So we yanked the harddrive and connected to my work station since the cd-rom is fried on the laptop as well and we started to scan the dive for viruses yeah look at the detections…only question I have is how and why does this person even have one of our machines?: pics removed
once again …parents have to point the finger some where
Debate intensifies over Hot Coffee sex in GTA – PC News at GameSpot
ok this game is rated “M” for a reason, if parents dont want their children to view this content dont buy it for them! I understand that the code came from some where whether it was Rockstar or the modder iether way it shouldnt have been there.
i nearly died today
ok here i am riding my bike on campus heading to work from my class im in the middle of the cross walk …clearly i have the right-of-way ..apparently not in hays. there is this girl (surprise surprise a woman driver is involved) driving toward me at a higher speed than is posted she is not stopping i hit my break on my bike the break cable breaks..(ill take pictures later of my broken cable)…I leap from my bike finally she comes to a screeching hault inches from my poor bike. and she sits in her car giving me this die and go to hell look and doesnt even get out and appologize for almost killing me! Today i confirmed there is someone watching over me and i do have a guardian angel.
